Monday, December 15, 2008

Not Quite a Lame Duck Yet


Hey, you got to at least give it to the man; he's leaving office with his reflexes sharp as hell. I mean, it took less than a second for Iraqi journalist Muntadar al-Zaidi to hurl his weapons of locomotion at our man's head, but Señor Jorge came out unscathed. True, on the second try (the right shoe?) Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al Maliki intervened and blocked the projectile (we used to call that a Yo Mama moment on the playground), but the first duck was Bush all by himself. There's a good joke in here about the outgoing Prez being used to successfully dodging flying shite and various other detritus flung in his direction, but I'll leave that to the commenters (commentators?).

As the recipient of many a flying shoe in my boyhood, I am somewhat jealous. Slippers, galoshes, boots, and even wooden clogs were Mummy's weapon of choice as I was growing up and frequently pissing her off. To my defense, however, she always chose to pelt me with these missiles while my back was turned, but still. I should've heard them coming--if thrown with enough passion (and believe you me, they were), those things whistle through the air like Nazi .88s. I'm still envious, though. But I suppose if you're launching objects at a former baseball team owner you're bound to miss here and there. I mean you know Georgie took at least a couple of batting practice sessions with the Rangers, during the time he co-owned them.

Apparently White House Press Secretary Dana Perino may have suffered a black eye in the wake of the shoe-throwing incident. "Politico" is reporting that Ms. Perino was injured by a microphone in the ensuing melee.

This makes the inner, repressed 5th Grader in me giddy. I don't know, as a former TV audio guy there's something about being whacked upside yo' head with a flying mic that makes me laugh. That and seeing people slip on ice. I know, I know! I am striving to be more compassionate, more empathetic, a better human being, but I have been a Pavlov's dog for too long. Suppressing my idiotic, childish impulses has been a hard struggle. But I ain't giving up. No sir.


Jasper Palmer said...

Seeing that video this morning made my day. While I would have loved to see his eminence struck squarely between the eyes with a shoe . . . in my fantasy it is a track spike, there is something appropriate with America's rascal president making one last appearance, stirring up shit, and escaping unscathed. I guess it is also appropriate that there was some collateral damage, in the form of Dana Perino. I'm sure his excellency feels her pain.

Anonymous said...

If you watch carefully, the guy throws two fantastic strikes, from quite a ways away. Think about it, Bush was behind a lectern so The Pitcher didn't have much room to work with--maybe 18 inches. The second shoe goes right for his head. The guy has a great arm. Definitely ahead of the count.

Anonymous said...

Funny... You had a shoe throwing mother too!! Carmella NEVER missed.. and she always got me as I was running away as well... LOL!!!